Hard Conversations
In my newsletter this week, I would like to talk about the idea of having hard conversations. When we think about things that come up in our lives that has caused us pain, stress or maybe has put us in an awkward position, do we avoid and ignore the offense or do we approach the situation with grace and mercy so it does not cause division? Do we automatically suppress our feelings because we do not want to have hard conversation for fear of losing a relationship? I guess what I am asking is: why do people run from conflict? The better question is do we respect our offender enough to sit down and speak truth in love? These types of discussions are never fun, but they are at times necessary. Many people would rather push aside an offense rather than approach it straight on. They would rather harbor resentment than confront those who have wronged them. Why do you think it is easier to ignore than it is to address the person or persons directly? When we avoid these areas that need to be talked about, stress and anxiety increase. By having a plan and taking time to reflect before discussing, we generally will see a better outcome for both parties. In the Bible, in the book of John - chapter 4, we see that Jesus also had to have a difficult conversation. Some may recognize this story as the woman at the well. Let me briefly lay it out for you. As Jesus was traveling back from Judea to Gaililee, he had to travel through Samaria. On the way, Jesus sees a well and stops because he needs a drink. This is where he begins his hard conversation. As he approaches the well, he runs into a woman who was filling up jars from the well. He kindly asked her for a drink. She questioned him on why he is talking to her since she was a Samaritan woman and he was a Jew? Jesus goes on to share that if she would give him a drink then he would give her a different type of water - (the living water). He proceeds to tell her that the water she has will leave her thirsty, and it will only quench her thirst temporarily. However, what he has to offer, will fill her up for eternity and she will never have to thirst again. During their conversation, we see Jesus gently approach the woman with some private information that only he could know about her - a secret sin. Notice that he approaches her at the right time, and addresses her lifestyle in a way that speaks in truth and love and through the story we see the power of his words. Without this conversation, her life would look significantly different if he had not had that difficult conversation. In the end, she was free and redeemed from the very thing that was keeping her in bondage. True transformation was evident and with love she was a changed person. So, what hard conversations do you need to have today?
a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, Ecclesiastes 3:7. Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth.
John 17:17
Chaplain Tracey Burns
Reflection Questions:
What hard conversations are you avoiding?
How will you approach the person/persons who have offended you?
Will you seek God first and ask Him to give you confidence as you speak truth in love?
Bonus: Great song (if you are interested) - When you are nervous or fearful just remember Jesus is with you and “That’s the Power” that you need to complete the job. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwEXH-jIsgA